Influencing our Children's Self-Esteem (2)

The second important “A” word with respect to helping develop our children's self-esteem to higher levels is Acceptance. This is where we as parents show our unconditional love for the child. We may not be overly pleased with certain behaviours but we show them that we take them as they are. When we are attuned to them and understand their characteristics, temperament and interests, we can then be move to the arena of acceptance.

When we have preconceived notions of how our children should behave or what interests we would like them to have, we are setting up a situation of conditional love where we may be saying directly or indirectly (but the child is picking it up) that I want to re-form you. I think you would really enjoy this activity because I did when I was your age. This is especially difficult for parents who have had strong interests or strengths in certain areas—sports, music, art, dance, etc.—and the child does neither show interest and/or ability in these areas.

How many sports parents, name a sport, have the parents so enmeshed with their children that they don't see that they either have no superior ability or actual interest but they sign up the child at an early age.

Accepting the child for who he/she is assists in their development of sense of self, the fundatmental ingredient to high self-esteem.


(To hear more of this discussion tune into Island Parent Radio on Village 900 (AM) or www. village900.com on Sunday February 18th at 9 am (PST).)