Extraordinary Fathers

Having Alan Poole on the show yesterday talking about extraordinary fathers inspired me to listen to our radio show, something I don't often do. I was struck with the level of honesty we have on our program. We all opened up about our own struggles to some degree.

For his Master's Thesis, Alan studied a specific group of men who had facilitated small groups within my course. He wanted to know what contributed to their parenting in a positive way. What he found was that an willingness to look at their own behavior was one of the first steps to open the door to deepening their relationship with their family. Letting go of the old belief systems of having do "be right", "be the authority figure" or the "boss" is a big step for most men. But as Alan said, at some point you just realize that jumping into a gorilla suit and beating your chest doesn't work!

I appreciated Alan saying it was his two year old giving him feedback about his own behavior that really turned things around for him. Just after yelling at his four year old daughter to "Get to your room!" his two year old son said, "Dad you shouldn't yell at Aerial, you should just love her."

I think we can all think of a time early in our parenting where our children provide us with a mirror to show us something that we might otherwise never see.

I really enjoyed having Alan on the show!

Allison