Parent as Mentors

As our children grow older they are looking at us more as mentors and role models than as caregivers and rule makers. I am presently facilitating a group of parents of teens and as I listen to their thoughts and challenges, I realise the importance of role-modelling.

It's no longer a "do as I say" world, which I suspect it has never been. Actions do speak louder than words and if whatever you say is in contradiction to to how you act, the action part will overrule the verbal part. It is so important that as parents—actually as anyone—that our verbal and nonverbal messages are consistent.

I had the pleasure of having lunch with Barbara Coloroso last week when she was in Victoria. Her life is a true example of the verbal being consistent with her actions. Her latest book, Extra Ordinary Evil, is just another demonstration of her commitment and passion for not only children but all of humanity. During our conversation, she spoke of a recent trip to Dubai and how the children growing up in this incredibly wealthy nation maybe hearing about concepts of respect but are not seeing it in action. She gave examples of how young elementary school children treated others including teachers so poorly and disrespectfully.

In some respects, her experience in Dubai is more devastating than the conditions in Rwanda.

What are we teaching our children?